Posted on Oct 22, 2009 | Comments 0
From time to time we all disagree.
With a little knowledge and a few thoughtful choices, however, you can prevent a disagreement from escalating into an argument.
First, deal with problems while they are still small. The longer you ignore your concerns and feelings, the less likely you are able to express them in a constructive way.
Waiting also makes it more likely that you will lose sight of what is really bothering you, and allow other complaints, some of which may be ultimately meaningless, to cloud the primary issue.
Second, learn how to discuss things in a calm and respectful way. This means listening when the other person speaks, asking questions and restating their concerns to make sure you understand them, and choosing your words carefully to avoid accusing the other person or being hurtful or disrespectful. [Good Listener]
When at all possible, postpone potentially argumentative discussions for a time when all parties are calm and not distracted.
Know when to stop. Sometimes a discussion just isn’t going anywhere. In times like these, continuing the discussion will only lead to increased frustration.
Take a short break, consider postponing the discussion for later, or consider asking a neutral third party, such as a friend or counselor depending on the nature of the issue, for help.
When you are wrong, admit it. There is no shame in apologizing, and no weakness in admitting that you have made a mistake. Never hold on to a position just to â€œsave face.â€
And finally, remember the golden rule, and handle your disagreements with others by modeling the same type of behavior you want them to use when they disagree with you.
Posted in: Self Help