Throughout the day we think we know what people are thinking when we say to ourselves about that girl in the bar â€˜oh she thinks I am ugly and she is making fun of meâ€™.
We also think we know what people are thinking and feeling when we are walking our dog and the people drive by and smile at you and we think â€˜what are they laughing atâ€™.
These are completely normal and usual behaviors and thoughts that everyone feels and thinks at some time in their lives.
These thoughts, feelings and behaviors are what are called â€˜self-defeatingâ€™ behaviors. Each day we all need to pay special and close attention to our thoughts to make sure we do not carry out in these self-defeating ways.
Have you heard of the book The Secret? It could be completely true that how we think and feel affects the outcomes of our life. For example if I think â€˜I am so not doing to make that deadlineâ€™ then the chances of me making that deadline are slim to none because my attitude in the situation does not nurture anything positive!
Many times people expect the myth that negative or bad things happen in threes. For example if someone passes or gets hurt people oftentimes expect things to happen in threes. Something else horribly tragic may happen then people really think something else tragic will happen, making it three bad things.
When you dismiss any positive thoughts and concentrate only on negative thoughts and possibilities you are actually completely robbing you of any happiness. This is completely concentrating on two negative possibilities.
Another way we let situations get us down is when something bad happens we assume that thing will always happen in that situation.
If we are in love and they betray our trust by cheating on us we generalize and assume any person we fall in love with will hurt us. Oftentimes if we are in a car accident it is difficult to drive by that spot for we assume we will get in another accident there.
We need to concentrate on the positive things in our life [positive attitude]. We need to concentrate on the endless possibilities in our lives. It is only natural to be concerned or worried once in awhile but always concentrate on the possibilities and positives.