Posted on Jul 05, 2010 | Comments 0
Marriage â€“ A vice you canâ€™t live without, even today. The institution of marriage has gone through a major evolution since the time it first came about. And now the joy of staying single reigns high. It is an ever evolving upward and downward slope, like it has been with all the ever changing trends. Change, as they say, is inevitable.
Initially, it gave couples back then a better chance of making it through at least to their children’s independence. Together they found shelter, fire, food and water – and defense against others.
From there we moved into marriages of convenience. These were arranged marriages, from the poorest to the highest in society. The poor married not only to combine together whatever meager owning they had, but also to connect with whomever was most convenient, geographically.
The highest bred arranged marriages to combine wealth, landholdings and armies. Love in these marriages was not even considered.
And then around the 1800â€™s came about love before being married and perhaps the start of a womanâ€™s independence movement as well.
After the 1940â€™s started the divorce trend and has increased so much to this day that people are becoming more and more comfortable to opt for single-dom.
“Getting married is like bungee-jumping off the highest peak, only the bungee chord is a shoelace…” People preferring to stay single say why:
- Career Prospects – One need not be saddled with the emotional baggage of responsibility, when intending to climb the career ladder. Trying for that promotion entails, working late, socialising with the boss at all odd hours, which can be done with ease provided there is no one waiting to be informed of the sudden odd hours back home.
- Freedom – The freedom to take decisions, be it monetary or any other can be done without guilt or consultation. Happiness translates to never asking for permission. The permission to staying up late partying, or the whimsical trip that you needed to take on your holiday can always be indulged anytime guilt-free.
- Financial wellbeing â€“ When you are single, you need not feel guilty or pressured to have lost that job or to have squandered your income. You are answerable only to yourself and no one else. You get to choose maintaining your income or spending it. Lawyers opine that most divorces are mainly due to one of the partners failing to live up to the financial expectations of the other. Now you are saved from that.
- Compromise â€“ So if this holds true why go to the expensive length of getting married to realise it. You know you have an opinion and your partner too has one on different matters that may not match. Difference of opinion brings about disagreements, heartaches, arguments and fights. Itâ€™s best to stay single, follow your whims and fancies and live life as you want.
- Family life â€“ Bringing up a child is no easy task and needs the cooperation and understanding between the partners. If one of them fails to live up to the responsibilities, the onus and additional responsibility falls on the other. This is significant enough for either of the partners to feel pressured, file for a divorce or separation. In the process the child and the aggrieved partners suffer. Staying single wouldnâ€™t entail hassles of such magnitude. If a child is adopted by a staying single individual, the share of rearing a child single-handedly, with all its joys and sorrows, rests only with one.
Every lifestyle has its pros and cons. The biggest advantage of being single is being responsible to oneself. There is a great deal of joy in living life as one wants instead of being saddled with a partner and having to make joint decisions.
There is great joy in doing things yourself independently. The saying, marry in haste and repent in leisure holds great deal of truth in this day and age.
Posted in: Love & Relationships