Posted on Oct 22, 2008 | Comments 0
The number one issue voiced by most couples is â€œwe have trouble communicating.â€ Itâ€™s a common complaint.
And many couples think they would benefit from communication training.
Many seem to think if they could better express themselves or if their spouse would only listen and understand what they mean then things in the marriage would dramatically improve.
While the thought may be genuine and the results of actually implementing some of these techniques may improve the marriage a bit, the improvements wonâ€™t be lasting.
When you get right down to it, communication in marriage is not about being understood by each other, communication[Communication skills] is about handling what another person thinks and feels.
You see, married couples donâ€™t have trouble communicating. They communicate all too well. In a committed relationship, you cannot not communicate (pardon the double negative).
Communication problems happen because you donâ€™t like what the other person has to say.
For instance, you may want your spouse to be more emotionally open and share their feelings, but you interrupt them when they say things you find unpleasant or disagree with (in your view, you may just want to keep the conversation â€œaccurateâ€). You want a more expressive spouse, but want to control what they express.
Read more at Zenhabits
Posted in: Love & Relationships